FEATHERS

8 01 2012

I have an aviary in the garden,

 

So, I had to beg my wife’s pardon,

 

Because there were feathers in our bedroom

 

Which I had to sweep out with a broom.

 

Now, how they got there, I couldn’t understand,

 

Because the distance was really grand.

 

So, to search for their origin I was resolved,

 

And , eventually the problem was solved,

 

Because I found that of all things,

 

The feathers came from my wife’s wings.

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TRUE STORY

8 01 2012

I am ninety two years old,

 

But, still have a story worth being told.

 

It concerns a Scottish farmer, who, while working in his field

 

Heard someone screaming while for help he appealed.

 

He went to see what it was all about,

 

And found a boy in a bog unable to get out.

 

He was stuck in the mud up to his waist,

 

So he pulled him out with the utmost haste.

 

Shortly thereafter what happened was that

 

He was visited by an aristocrat.

 

Who claimed that the boy in the bog was his son,

 

And he wanted to reward him for what he had done.

 

But the farmer claimed that payment was not needed,

 

Because he was glad that to save the boy he succeeded.

 

Just then, the farmer’s son happened to appear,

 

And the nobleman said that he had an idea.

 

He then turned round, and calmly stated,

 

That he would arrange for the boy to be educated

 

To the same extent as that of his own son,

 

Because, if he was like his father, he would be a deserving one.

 

So the boy studied medicine , and became a physician of fame,

 

Because he discovered Penicillin since Femister was his name.

 

Because this discovery happened to occur,

 

He was eventually knighted and became a Sir.

 

Now, his sponsor was Sir Randolph Churchill,

 

Whose son, later, with pneumonia became seriously ill

 

But he was saved by penicillin, I am glad to say,

 

And what Winston achieved is known to this day.

 

 

 

 





DNA

27 12 2011

If one is hyper energetic,

 

It is usually genetic.

 

And if one is unusually placid

 

It can be related to Desoxy Nucleic Acid.

 

And it also applies,

 

To the colour of one’s eyes,

 

Or that of one’s skin,

 

Or whether one is fat or thin

 

If lack of energy is the permanent state

 

It may be due to lack of Adenosine Tri Phosphate.

 

And so, many a characteristic or shape or size,

 

And one’s capability or otherwise,

 

And be them all as they may,

 

Are dependant on the DNA





Haridi

27 12 2011

There was a Jew who was orthodox,

 

Who, in his room had a box,

 

Where he kept the instruments he used

 

When his wife, he abused.

 

Eventually she made a stink,

 

But they didn’t want anyone to think

 

That there was trouble in the community,

 

Which boasted of it’s unity.

 

So, she was left without any hope,

 

And, on her own she had to cope.

 

So, she took her kids and ran away,

 

And is missing till this day.

 

But, her husband keeps on praying,

 

That the Almighty will tell him where she’s staying

 

Because she has no right away to run,

 

And deprive him of his fun

 

Now, there’s a moral to this story,

 

Although it might sound rather gory,

 

It’s, if an abuser you want to be,

 

Keep your wife under lock and key  





DEMOCRACY

23 12 2011

A Jewish Democratic State, they claim,

 

But, democracy is inappropriate in the name,

 

Because, laws were passed that retract ,

 

From democracy being a fact.

 

More laws they are now trying to pass,

 

To make women citizens of second class.

 

Now, if a democracy is true to it’s name,

 

The rights of men and women are the same.

 

But, they are already separated at places of prayer,

 

And some can’t attend plays or concerts if men are there.

 

They want to keep them apart on busses and trains,

 

As well, of course, on aeroplanes.

 

They don’t want men to listen when women sing,

 

Because they think that it is a terrible thing.

 

On billboards in the streets they don’t want women to be seen,

 

Because, they apparently think a female face is obscene,

 

So, we’re becoming like Afghanistan,

 

When they were controlled by the Taliban.

 

So, I want to point out,

 

And let there be no doubt,

 

That, the separation of the sexes in a true democracy,

 

Only happens in a public lavatory.

 

 





IKY

23 12 2011

Echimosis is a bruise,

 

And Iky Moses the king of the Jews.

 

Iky is the miniature of my name

 

And chanting it to me was a puerile game.

 

That is why, to tell the truth,

 

I was known as Kappy throughout my youth.

 

But, what in the Diaspora Iky meant,

 

No longer applied when to Israel I went.

 

So I reverted to my original name,

 

And, from then on, Isaac I became.

 

And, although it is spelled in many a way,

 

It has remained so until this day.  





APOLOGY

19 12 2011

On pondering the subject, I surmise,

 

That I should apologise,

 

That my so called poetry rhymes,

 

As opposed to that of modern times.

 

Of ignorance I may be accused,

 

Because, to give in, I refused.

 

But, when ignorance is bliss,

 

I am sure that I am not remiss,

 

When I venture to suppose

 

That it is no different to prose.

 

So, to remain old fashioned, I intend,

 

And will continue with this trend,

 

At the risk of being regarded

 

As a poet that’s retarded